I was thinking this morning as I was running around the loop in my neighborhood that this would be the last time I would run it......this year. I finished 600 miles of running this morning contemplating how many times I began that route. Probably close to 200 times, (42 times in one day).
During my run I tried to lift my head and look around and see what I so often probably miss because my eyes are focused on the road ahead. How much am I missing? Who have I not seen? I realized this while I was running in Colorado. Such a beautiful sight, it would be a shame to run thru this country and not be aware of my surroundings. I should always be at the forefront of my attention and focus.
There are many lasts:
It was the last time I would go to work.......in 2014.
It was the last time I would eat pizza.....this should be so true but it is so good!
It was the last time I would wake up......sounds morbid, just recognizing.
It was the last phone call, last email, last text message, last Skype, last blog post, last voicemail, the last piece of digital communication in 2014. How will I communicate in the new year?
It was the last time I would kiss my wife, hug my wife, tell her I love her, tell her I'm sorry, tell her a silly story, make her laugh, make her cry, be grumpy towards her, hurt her feelings, lay down beside her, wake up next to her, stare into her eyes and hold her hand. A painful thought if it couldn't exist in the new year. How will I do these things tomorrow......and the next.......and the next......and forever?
At the office there are many last times. Last time to drive to work, last time to sign in, last time to log in, last meeting, last phone call, last project, last invoice, last check, last bill, last time I clean my desk (okay I don't do that now), last time to doodle an idea, the last time to make a difference, last time to leave the office. What will we do different at IONIC tomorrow? And the day after? How will I feel when it really is the last time?
It will be the end of our silly doggie greeting us so energetically when we arrive home. Whether we have been gone all day or just five minutes, we get the same loving greeting.
It will be the last television show, last movie, last article to read, last scripture to recite, last broadcast to hear, last song to sing, last time to wake up to birds chirping, last time to go to sleep with fireworks blasting off (illegally) by the neighbors, last time to fall asleep before my wife making it difficult for her to sleep due to my snoring......sorry :(
It will be the end of tasting food......oh so tasty food, not cardboard but really good stuff. Why waste our palettes on things that are not really worth it? It was the end of eating out, the end of warming up leftovers, the end of counting calories, the end of taking my meds, the end of checking my insulin, the end of poking my finger, the last cookie, the last piece of candy, the last time I eat healthy, the last time I cheat on my diet and the last time I step on the bathroom scales.......the last time to be dissappointed.
It will be the end of talking with my children, the end of hearing their voice, no more reading their texts, no more hugging them, no more telling them I love them, no more picking up their babies (our grand babies). It will be the end of sharing my advise, my wisdom (is there any?), my stories, my goofiness, my seriousness, my sorrow, my encouragement, my struggles, my triumphs, my failures, my care, my concerns, my shortfalls, my wishes, my dreams......my regrets.
It is the ending of picking up my clothes off the floor, the end of missing the hamper, the end of folding them and putting them away (okay, I don't do that now), the end of washing the dishes, the end of wiping off the counters, the end of sweeping the floor (okay, I don't do that now.....Rosie the Romba), the end of mowing the lawn, planting flowers, trimming the hedges, mulching the beds, fixing what is broken (okay, I don't do that now), the end of making the bed, of fluffing the pillows, of hanging up my coat, of throwing my coat on the sofa, of trying on clothes that don't fit.....too tight...too big....too old.....too ugly.....never did like it anyway.
It is the end of taking a shower, the end of brushing my teeth, the end of shaving my face, the end of combing my hair (okay I don't do that now), the end of using mouthwash, the end of splashing on colognes, the end of having to go to the bathroom room, the end of sitting on the pot without any toilet paper and having to text my wife in the other room to bring some from the other bathroom......okay, TMI.
If it was truly the end and there were no more opportunities I think it would truly be sad. Just writing some of these was sad. How often do we miss opportunities today that present themselves right in front of our faces that we don't take advantage of? How much time and opportunities do we waste? As time continues to march along in my life I have been given more opportunities to reflect on my mistakes and my misses. Age and wisdom has that effect.
Fortunately for nearly everyone of us we wake up every morning with those opportunities still in front of us. Still the ability to act and react. We use the new year as our RESET button, a time to start over, to change what we do and how we do it. In reality we shouldn't have any RESOLUTIONS. We should be doing the things we are supposed to already, only adjusting them, to do them better than before. It doesn't take a new year to hit the reset, we have one every morning if it is needed. What you did yesterday is in the past and the future is before you to make a difference.
The real question is........will you?
My friends, do not waste the chances you have been given. Do not forget about all the little things we take for granted...........and I will see you in the morning.
ET This I Believe
Eugene Thompson
Run Eugene Run
A clean slate to run again in 2015. All that I did in 2014 doesn't matter, it is what I do tomorrow that counts.