Visiting back home has always been a bit difficult for me ever since my father passed away in '85. Just tough memories and things never really felt the same. I should have made a better effort to overcome that and stay in touch with family and friends. Now that my mother is now gone there are less reasons to return. A brief business transaction during our visit to resolve my mothers estate will close the roots to this hometown of mine. I will forever now be just a visitor to Bartlesville.
The reunion was a great opportunity to visit and become reacquainted with long lost friends. Some going back all the way to kindergarten. That is amazing to have known friends that long.....and we can still be friends......even if I did unravel Martha's napping rug 42 years ago on the floor of Garfield Elementrary.
There were others that became close friends at McKinley Elementary where we began playing and developing those fond memories. So fun recalling the times when we were forced to square dance in PE class. My former partners Kim and Jamie were there......good thing the band didn't play any oh down music to revive any of those 'two step' moves. And of course Scotty and Rob were there to remind me of all the mischief we....okay mainly me.....got into back then. Many of my close friends weren't able to make it back for the gathering. It felt a little incomplete without them.
Middle School and then High School accumulated even more relationships as each elementary feed into Central Jr. High. That building still looks great. What a classic piece of historic architecture. Football began in those years and a new kind of bonding with the guys occurred. So many people in Jr. High that it was difficult to make friendships.....or at least for me.....stricken with a terrible case of shyness.
College High School and Sooner High became Bartlesville High as our city combined our cross town rival into one conglomerate in '83 with 500+ in each class. New friends and new adventures so many with what seemed like such a short period of time that it was hard to get too close. This reunion allowed us to finally know a little more about each other.
Thirty years ago I probably had more insecurities and struggles trying to figure out who I was back then. The reunion reminded me of that and even though I am far from that shy little boy of ages ago some of those feelings resurfaced.....feeling a little out of place in a town I once called home. Do we try to justify who we have now become to all of our friends? Maybe. I'm not sure that it matters anymore to anyone. We have all grown up and I think most just like seeing and chatting with each other for a short time. At the close of the weekend most of us will all retreat back to our homes in distant far away places and slip back into the comfort that we have wrapped ourselves up in. There is nothing wrong with that. I am envious of those who have maintained close relationships or even stayed nearby. I don't think there can ever be anyone as close as those you grew up with.
Speaking of knowing me while I grew up.....I was probably a jerk to some back then. I deeply apologize for any stupid stuff I did back in those days. Can I blame it on teenage hormones and adolescents? I hope so. Just so you know I did grow out of that......mostly.
I didn't get around to posting this for one reason or another. I have had the chance to ponder all of the event and run things through my mind several times. It wasn't necessarily all that I had hoped mostly because there were so many that I hung out with that didn't make it to the event. It was nice to talk with friends and hear how they were doing and what they were doing in their lives. And others I got to know a little better. Probably hardly talked with some from high school days for one reason or another.....probably mostly due to shyness. It was nice to talk and make 'new' friends from some of the old friends. Still there were others that I never got the opportunity to "meet" at the reunion. Maybe some of that separation is still there like high school. Who knows, maybe we still don't have anything in common.
Regardless, it did make me a little homesick. Funny saying that because I have lived in Virginia Beach longer than I ever lived in Bartlesville. This is my home now......this is where I belong. The other is just a distant memory that sometimes feels like a dream.
Some times dreams are best left as dreams. I don't see me venturing back to Bartlesville often, maybe for the next big reunion. My brother and my sister who still live there don't often communicate. Until my mothers funeral I hadn't spoke with them for over ten years. Unforately I fear that it will have to be another tragedy to bring us back together. Life is funny like that.
Through all the hurdles growing up, I really didn't have many, I still think Bartlesville was one of the best places to grow up. I had great memories as a child. Some bigger than they probably actually were......that's okay, memories are supposed to be that way.
A salute to my friends of the class of '84..... The best there is!
Stay safe until the next time.
D. Eugene Thompson
ET This I Believe