Traveling Pet Peeves

We are currently on a trip to Lubbock Texas.  Of course there are no direct flights from Norfolk to Lubbock....unless you want to pay an arm and a leg.....So the first half of this journey we will account for the pet peeves that always seem to pop up during our travel trips.

Smashed to Bits
What makes you grumpy when you’re traveling? Plain and simple, being smashed into a tiny space on a plane for 8 hours. It makes me excruciatingly aware of what my dog must have gone through being squished into a small cage for 12 hours when we run out the door for work. I am not a dog.

Hotel Noise
Doors slam at 2 a.m. The clock radio next door goes off at 4 a.m. with no one in the room. Beavis & Butthead have a drunken brawl in the hallway. Pop cans tumble down out of the machine like high-mountain landslides. The elevator pings. Just so happen we booked the motel with an all-star highschool girls softball team...yippee. Also, I think somebody has some sort of BIRD with them here in this motel....either that or we have a small rain forest just outside our door! Peace and quiet are the true unattainable luxuries in modern travel, and 5-star hotels are no better than Motel 6.

Grumpy Service
General grumpiness. I now expect the ticket agent, the flight attendant and the cab driver to be unfriendly. This should not be an expectation of travel. It’s a rare flight attendant who genuinely smiles and cares about whether I have peanuts or not. Or how about the people at the gate check in that says to me (without even a frown or oh, I am sorry) we don't have a seat for you yet?  What do you mean you don't have a seat for me yet? I bought my tickets 6 weeks ago.  You are confirmed but we don't have a seat for you yet? So what exactly does CONFIRMED mean? Sir we don't have a seat for you yet?  Yeah I heard that part....I see that the 14 flight attendants and pilots over here have a seat assignment, they aren't even servicing the flight! Sir, please step to one side while I help the people behind you.  Hey what about me....they shouldn't have a seat either if I don't....why don't you just anounce over the loud speakers that you don't have any more seats YET? Because you overbooked! Sir please settle down or I will have to tazzer you. Hey, when do the seats BECOME available.....can you find more inside that little computer you are hiding behind....come on, you aren't even looking at anything! You are probably playing on facebook!  ZZZZZaaappppp!

Buddy, Can You Spare a Bose?
Believe me, I get it. Portable music players are ubiquitous — you can’t walk 20 feet in an airport without seeing ear buds dangling from ears both young and old. Don’t get me wrong: I have gone through a few iPods. What I don’t love is hearing the song selections — invariably dominated by a pounding, drilling, headache-inducing bass — of the person sitting next to me on a plane. Just because you have your music turned way up to drown out the engine noise doesn’t mean you are in a sound bubble. Here’s a request from the two dozen people surrounding you in coach: If you can’t survive a two-hour flight without cruising your playlists at sound-barrier-busting decibels, invest in some noise-canceling headphones. I will even chip in a donation — or at the very least stop sending you dirty looks.

Human Stampede
My biggest travel pet peeve is when people plow over one another to get either on or off a plane, bus, boat, etc. Come on, don't you know the unwritten rule of airplane etiquette? If you are in a row behind someone, wait for them to get off first.....lady in landing in Memphis.....next time I am going to run YOU over....but still smile in Christian love and say....OOPS.  Also....all you that have too much crap to store overhead....please step aside so I can get to my seat....PLEASE!

Human Megaphones
By far, a loud talker who thinks it is completely appropriate to discuss every detail of his/her (fill in the blank) with the whole cabin. Almost as a rule, such loud talker always comes with a voice so grating to the ear that you are not spared even if the chatter is in a language you don’t understand. The only thing that tops the above? When a loud talker meets another. Yes I am in air right now. Yes, there is a pair of loud talkers two rows in front of me. Thank Microsoft for the noise-cancelling headphones I picked up right before getting on the road!
 Exploding Bladder
Surely one of the most frustrating aspects of travel is the inability to find a restroom when you really need one.  Worse in a car....shouldnt have had the second cup of coffee.  Oh yeah, flight is late, connecting flight is located in the next county and I have 16 minutes to run like OJ Simpson to get there in time......no time for potty break....dont need to actually.....until I finally sit down comfortably in my compact life vest inflating not really reclining seat located in the middle of two former linemen for the Florida State Seminoles....yeah....excuse me, excuse me, excuse me.  I think he is going to EAT me!

Overhead Bin Poaching
On the plane they wobble with their oversize carry-on. Spying an open bin at row 6, they wedge it in (coincidentally smashing my computer) and then traipse on back to row 75, pleased with themselves for saving $50 in baggage fees and outsmarting late boarders who actually are seated in row 6. The flight attendants do nothing — they don't want to be the police.

Recliners at 30,000 Feet
Flying coach is bad enough, but it's worse when the passenger in the seat in front of you decides to recline her seat back. It makes it nearly impossible to work on my laptop, enjoybeverage or watch a movie on a portable DVD player. Why shouldn’t we all make sure our fellow travelers are as comfortable as possible? As the announcement says, just keep your seat in the upright position — at all times. Didnt happen to me this time but to the guy sitting next to me....I thought they were going to get into a fight as he punched the back of the seat in front of him protesting his dissatisfaction.

Security Lollygaggers
People who can’t quickly and efficiently navigate airport security, they have a million things, they should have checked their suitcase, they don’t take their laptop out of their bag, they don’t remove their shoes, their belt, their coat, remove the change from their pockets, they are carrying a bottle of water … Come on, these are fairly simple rules, people. I actually felt a bit bad for Mira (retired mayor) and Roger her husband as they struggled through security.  Yep they were on our flight.  Poor Roger went back through that security 15 times before they finally had to pat him down.....Wasnt upset with him as much as the security...after 3 times....do you think, you could of helped him to one side rather than making us all watch this sceen over and over again like GroundHog Day?

Predictability
My greatest travel peeve? When things go right. I hate it when a trip unfolds exactly as the itinerary describes … then it is rinsed of adventure, washed of discovery, the wrinkles of danger and serendipity are ironed away. It’s like breakfast two weeks ago or that hotel room last month where nothing happened — impossible to remember. What makes a trip transcendental is when things go wrong, when we get lost, when we are challenged. One thing I know of travel is that we feel most alive when we can imagine our own demise. Then travel becomes sublime. Fortunately, our lives always become an adventure!