Sunday, October 10, 2010

Parenting - the never-ending task/reward

There are so many books on parenting and so much advice on how to do it and how to communicate and how to, how to, how to etc.  truth comes when you are actually a parent and you are actually parenting.  Books may give advice but it is all spontaneous efforts at that particular time in your life and your children's lives. Each child is different.  Each situation is different. 

We have always joked about kids do not come with an instruction manual. Every manual would have to be different.  Parenting can only be effective when you know your child as well as you know yourself. When you can trust your child as well as you can trust yourself.  That takes a lot of effort.  Weekend parenting wont cut it. Just spending time in the evening wont cut it.  You truly have to become best friends all of their lives.  Just just a parent. This isn't always popular to the younger child.  Only becomes a real aspect of the relationship when they call you from Colorado and their car is broke down with a bad transmission asking you advice as to cars and debt.  Then you have come to a point in that relationship where they actually accept your years of experience and your own hard knocks in life. Doesn't mean they will take your advice, but at least they asked for it.

The Bible tells us to raise up the child in the ways of the Lord and they will always return to it.  With children in the early 20's and a few older teenagers, we are still seeing that materialize.  It makes you feel good to be asked the questions of life.  It makes you feel good to be there when their little hearts are broken.  It makes you feel good when you go to their work late at night to give them a piece of birthday cake because they didn't have time to come over. However it doesn't mean that we, as parents, don't hurt when our little babies hurt.  Doesn't mean that we don't want to say, "I told you so." or "I thought I taught you better than that." we don't though.  We bite our tongue and hold our breath and wipe away the tears just like we did when they were little and fell down and skinned their knee.

It hurts often to be a parent. But it also is the most absolute best thing in the world at the same time. Every moment spent was never long enough, but never wasted.  Memories are hard to sift through but are precious to recount.  I love being a daddy. Have a good day my friends.

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