Sunday, June 19, 2016

Father's Day - Some days....Not so easy

I personally have a lot to be thankful for on Father's Day. But when this day comes around it's not always that easy. This years Facebook reminded me....like it often does from time to time.....especially as much as I play on it.....of what you did on this day. Sometimes it sucks. A story I wrote about my dad popped up earlier this week. So I have been thinking about him a lot. I have shared many stories about my father on here in the past. Most of them funny because I choose to remember those moments over any other to share with my family on how I remember my dad. 

I have lived more of my life without my father alive than I have when he was with us. He died the summer between my first and second year of college. He died at age 52. I have 671 days to reach that same age. And yes, it often haunts me as each day passes. Although I have many memories of him, I have far more wishes that I wish I could have had. I wish I could ask him about things. Maybe how he dealt with something in business. Maybe something about his childhood. Maybe something just about life in general. Unfortunately none of those conversations were ever able to occur. I was never able to have a heart-to-heart talk with my dad. I was never able to go have a drink with my dad. And as I flipped through photo albums trying to find an image this morning of just me and my father side by side…… There isn't one.

So this morning I'll share a story. One that I have recited many times to others about that summer day in Stillwater Oklahoma when I was embarrassed of my father. It is usually better told then read. My father provided or his family the best that he could. He was an entrepreneur at heart. He had three tax accounting offices in Oklahoma, held several patents on a non-aerosol spraying device and sold ice machines to fishing boats in Mexico. However, his decisions weren't always that well thought out in other things. I guess really many of ours aren't either at times. He thought that the best way to help me through college was to open up an office in the university town. He rented a place right down in the middle of all the apartments on the main drag through town just a few blocks from where I would take the majority of my classes in architecture. He remodeled all of the place that once housed many students I imagine. The front part of the house was more like an office while the back bedrooms served as a residence. 

So one day after class that second semester of my first year, I don't recall the date but I believe it had to be somewhere around this time of year. It was warm and the grass had grown needing to be mowed. My father's physical health had continued to decline due to the effects of diabetes. He believed that he was much stronger than he actually was but in reality he was very frail. We all knew it and could see it but apparently he was oblivious. It'd been a long day of classes and I was absolutely exhausted. I was ready to sit down and flop on the couch while watching some TV.

That wasn't going to happen today. As I approached the house with my backpack hung on my shoulder I happen to see my father getting ready to mow the front lawn. That in itself wasn't really a shock however the way that he was dressed was the real issue. I mentioned earlier that my father didn't always make the best decisions.….Choosing his casual attire was one of those decisions.

So let me try to describe what my dad was wearing. It was even disturbing back in the 80s. You have to imagine how he looked physically as well. So first he had these blue psychedelic shorts on.….We used to call them jams! I had a pair of purple ones exactly like them….I wish I still had them. That wasn't so bad however he chose to wear a white collared polo shirt that covered up his potbelly. I remember it had some sort of black-and-white striped collar. His bone white legs stuck out of those jams and he sported pea green dress socks with blue velvet running shoes. Those shoes never saw a day of running in his life. On top of his sparsely haired head he wore a black and red "Chicken Annie's" ball cap. Don't ask. The whole scene could've been placed in an episode of Twilight Zone.

So here my father is dressed viciously atrocious in front of the entire student body population of Oklahoma State University that chose to drive by that afternoon. As he attempted to mow the front lawn I quickly discarded my backpack inside and ran to take over the mowing. "Dad, dad, dad here let me do this. I've got it." I cursed under my breath because I really didn't want to mow the lawn today. It was hot and I was tired.

Before I'm finished I glanced over and saw my dad with the weedeater. What the heck was he trying to do? I quickly finish the mowing and then ran over to my father. "Dad, dad, and dad let me do this I've got the weedeater." This was crazy. I trimmed and edged the entire front lawn and before I knew it there he was again this time with the hedge clippers. Holy cow dad! Finishing up the trimming real quick I ran over to him once again, "Dad, dad, dad give me the hedge trimmers and I'll finish it." Yes of course I had to do all of the hedges that afternoon. I'm just glad he didn't get a wild hair and try to paint the entire outside of the house too.

I finished putting away all the tools and strolled in the house where my father had finally retired, thank God. He had prepared dinner for me that afternoon. It was never a TV dinner. It was always a fully cooked meal. I don't remember exactly what it was but I know it came with a nice cold glass of iced tea. Perfect for the guy who somehow conned me into mowing, edging and trimming of the entire yard in record time just so that I could protect him…. or was it me?…… from embarrassment concerning the most odd collaboration of clothing attire you would ever witness.

I wish I had a picture of my father that day as vivid as it rests in my memory. Maybe it's just better that way. Some memories only I can treasure. I'm sure nobody that ever drove past and saw that goofy old man even remembers it. They probably didn't even care at the time. A pretty stupid thing to be embarrassed about. You know what? I would wear a matching outfit with him today if he could be here beside me for a picture that I would surely post on Facebook
Chicken Annie hat and all!

Isn't that what Facebook and selfie's are all about!???

This week has been a pretty amazing week. Last Saturday I was able to play Top Golf with a bunch of my EO friends where I was introduced as the next year's Learning Chair. On Monday I was recognized as one of the Hampton Roads Entrepreneur Excellence Award recipients. I even served on the panel sharing some of my story. I wonder what my dad would've thought about that? A busy time in the Virginia Beach office the rest of the week. And Friday I headed over to the Richmond office to work in the morning but joining the staff at the minor-league ballpark. Go Flying Squirrels! And on Saturday afternoon became a third time recipient of the grandfather award as my daughter gave birth to another son. 

Yes, I have been blessed abundantly, more than I could ever imagine.
Happy Father's Day to all those lucky dads and grand dads out there. Rejoice in the blessings that you have today. Since I've probably done a pretty good job of embarrassing my kiddos (Love you guys!) I choose today to begin embarrassment on the next generation. Selfie's with mygrand babies. Because that's what I do!







Love you Dad.

Eugene Thompson
ET This I Believe

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